al these men just sitting there smiling like...
dude, IT is still alive. how would you like to be drained? on national t.v.? just because you’re a rare size?
it's so curious how all other species get by in...
nothing comes to mind
Understanding your Sherlockian, a brief guide:
Sherlockian: Oh my Godtiss! THIS GIVES ME REICHENBACH FEELS.
Standard English: I find this very upsetting yet deeply moving.
Sherlockian: Not my Division.
Standard English: I am not responsible for that/I don't want to do that.
Sherlockian: I would have you on this table until you begged for mercy twice.
Standard English: I find you sexually attractive.
Sherlockian: I NEED WHOLOCK NOW.
Standard English: I think it would be great if there was a crossover between Doctor Who and Sherlock.
Sherlockian: *crying* All praise the Cumberlord!
Standard English: I find Benedict Cumberbatch to be a unique, attractive, and talented individual.
Sherlockian: Aww look, Martin Freeman!
Standard English: What an adorable hedgehog!
timelordy-teganbreann: joshishollywood: This song is ruining my life Omg
I just wanna thank the members of Congress who took a break from their...– President Barack Obama (via elesheva)
me on my period
me: why the fuck can't i have a penis
me: why the fuck does everyone feel the need to piss me off
me: why the fuck is food so beautiful
me: why the fuck don't guys have to go through this shit
me: why the fuck is world war 2 going on in my stomach right now
me: when the fuck is menopause
How to tell the difference between different...
POWER METAL: The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
THRASH METAL: The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.
HEAVY METAL: The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
FOLK METAL: The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave........ without the princess.
VIKING METAL: The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
DEATH METAL: The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
BLACK METAL: The protagonist IS the dragon, dwells in the heart of the night with in a castle full of hellhounds and eternal flames. He kills the sassy knight, fucks the noble steed and sacrifices the princess to Satan.
GORE METAL: The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her. Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
DOOM METAL: The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
PROGRESSIVE METAL: The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.
GLAM METAL: The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.
NU METAL: The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
She’s my daughter on Facebook.– Random girl at the library (via englandsdreaming)